Revisiting Kimi’s Guide to No Motorcycle Butt Pain

A year ago, after I had ridden over 4000 miles in 22 days with only five rest days in between, I wrote a blog titled “Kimi’s Guide to No Motorcycle Butt Pain.” It is far and away my most popular post. I really don’t get that much traffic here. So little that I sometimes think I am just sending words into the ether to vaporize into nothing. But, I like doing it, so I keep on keeping on.

The most common comment I got on the road was “Wow, I bet your ass hurts.” No, it didn’t.  I did not suffer from motorcycle butt pain. And I wasn’t riding one of those big, comfy rolling couches I see out there. It was this wee little Rebel 500 with a stock seat and no extra padding.

My Great Wisdom

So, as I was sitting on the big comfy couch at my sister’s house, I started thumbing out a post on how I keep my ass from hurting after putting in so many miles in the saddle.  My wisdom boiled down to:

• Physical Fitness: This applies to exercise on and off the motorcycle.
• Wearing the right gear
• Body Awareness – Also, applies to on and off the motorcycle
• Take Breaks

I didn’t really think I was putting out anything too groundbreaking there.  Seriously, it is the same advice for anyone who sits for long periods of time. Well, I guess the office desk jock doesn’t need much ‘gear’, but my gear suggestions were really about wearing comfortable underwear and not letting your ass get all sweaty, so I think it is pretty solid advice for an office desk jockey too.

What Are Visitors Looking For?

I’ve looked at the the search terms that lead people to “Kimi’s Guide to No Motorcycle Butt Pain.” They are things like:

• ass hurting after riding motorcycle
• dealing with but pain motorcycle riding
• how to stop your ass from hurting on a motorcycle
• how to stop getting a sore bum on long motorcycle rides

Sometime visitors click on exercises like this one or informative articles about motorcycle posture like this one. It is the rare bird who is interested in the most interesting topic of the parasympathetic nervous system. Most of the time the external link a visitor clicks on leads to products like these men’s no-fly micro fiber ones by Jockey, or these unisex ones by TomboyX or Ruby’s Lube All Natural Anti-Chafe Anti-Blister Balm or Body Glide or Anti Monkey Butt.

This makes me wonder what people are looking for when they search for these things.

I suspect Kimi’s Guide to No Motorcycle Butt Pain is slightly disappointing for some people. That they may be turned off by the the length of the posts. At 2000 words, it is one of my longest.  So, not only is there no pixie-ass-pain-dust, but they have to read. I imagine they are searching for a silver bullet, some little tweak they can make, some cream they can rub on or some squishy cushion or supportive seat they can buy that will magically make their ass pain disappear. Then, they arrive and I suggest work, awareness and breaks. That is just no fun.

Does it hold up?

A year later, I re-read Kimi’s Guide to No Motorcycle Butt Pain. I thought this post would be about updating it. I mean, I’ve only been riding for two season, so, perhaps I would add more wisdom.

I got nothing.

If anything, I needed a refresher on my own advice. I needed that nudge to get to the gym more and spend more time on my yoga mat. I needed to tell myself to meditate more and activate that parasympathetic nervous system more often. I needed to tell myself to get off my ass and move more.

I also needed to apply that same advice to life, not just on the motorcycle, but off.

Happy Cooking and Happy Parasympathetic System!